GREAT appts and NORMAL MEASUREMENTS for the FIRST TIME!

I was really nervous yesterday about going to my doctor appt after my last appt with him two weeks ago did not go so well.  I emailed him right after that last appt asking why he was doing this and explaining some of my points as to why I didn't want to do it.  He wrote right back saying that he was not stopping his work with me, that we still had a long way to go and that he just thought it would be healthier for me to take a break.  His last line was that I also did not have to get everything fixed before I start my life because my reconstruction will probably go on for most of my life.  Well, asking for everything to get fixed before I could "start my life" was not what I was asking.  So, after the last appt where it was all I could do to keep the tears from flowing and after the emails I was a little nervous to see him again.  I wasn't sure how he was going to act.  I was very pleasantly surprised.

He walked into the room with a warming smile on his face and immediately gave me a hug and showered me with praises on how great I looked, my clothes, my make-up.  It was nice.  I, in turn, jokingly complimented him on how great he was looking in his scrubs today.  He then took a look at my neck graft and he was pleasantly surprised at how well it has healed.  He was very happy with it.  Then he took a seat, got real close to me, placed his hands on my knee and kinda leaned on me and did his "inspection" work on me where he REALLY looks at where I've just had surgery, a graft done, a donor site, or looking to see what he wants to do next.  And he started looking at my face and I guess I had a piece of hair that was in my face and he ever so gently tucked it behind my ear.  And he did so in a lingering way, not quickly.  It was just so sweet.  Then, we started in on the conversation that he said in his email we would talk more about on my next visit.  And this time, it went much better.  I explained to him the insurance "things" that don't allow me to exactly "start" my life like he is asking me to do and he understood and explained to me that he's not asking me to get my career started because evidently that's just not really possible right now but what is it that I can do with my life while we take this break.  He said he is just trying to give me a break because my life for the past three years has been all about surgeries and then the recovery from the surgeries, not to mention doctor visits and hospital stays and most of the rest of my life is going to be some kind of reconstructive surgery.  He reassured me that he is absolutely not stopping his work with me.  Just wants me to do something with my life for a little while that doesn't have to do with doctor appts and surgeries/recovery.  OK.

Then he surprised me with  planning one last surgery before this "break."  He wants to do a z-plasty release on my eye and some z-plasty releases around my chin (and that's my chin, not my lip).  This one should just be a day surgery but the last time I was scheduled for a day surgery, it ended up as two nights in the hospital so we'll see about that.  So that made me happy.  He also made it sound like maybe this break wasn't going to be as long as 6 months.  I didn't ask because I didn't want to push it but it kinda sounded like we would get back at it sooner than the 6 months.  The rest of the appt was spent in our usual and unique doctor/patient banter that is special to our relationship.  He really took his time with me like he always used to.  Garrett and I have such a great time just talking about what he's done lately, what I've done lately, jokes and laughing together.  Half the time he doesn't feel like my doctor, which is really great, to me.  He is very professional when he needs to be and then plays around with me with fun banter and laughter together.  So now I'm waiting for a phone call from his MA to schedule this next surgery.

Then it was on to see Helen, my main OT (Occupation Therapist) at the Burn Center.  She was super happy to see me as always and also showered me with compliments on how great I was looking, how far I have come.  We talked about WBC for awhile and then we did the measurements, which I always dread because when we first started doing measurements they were so dismal and depressing and since then, with every surgery and every doctor appt we'd do more measurements and I am always scared to hear if I've lost ground.  But this time, I felt confident.  And I had reason to feel that way because my measurements on my neck were, for the first time since my accident, all NORMAL!  My head rotation on both sides were of a normal person's rotation and my neck extension, which has always been the worst for me because I was so badly burned on my neck and add on the bad healing genes I have, was an awesome 15.5 cm!!  A normal person's neck extension is 16cm so basically, I have the same neck extension as everyone else who don't have any kind of neck injury!!  Oh, I can't describe to you what it felt like to hear those numbers.  When I was at my worst contractures in my neck, my neck extension was a mere 6cm.  So basically, my chin was attached to my chest and I could barely turn my head from side to side.  I just can't believe I'm at where I'm at today with those measurements after such a long, hard struggle for three years.  However, my mouth measurements were something to be desired of.  I am 3cm short of a normal mouth opening, which is pretty bad.  But I knew those numbers were going to be bad.  And still, with my neck, even though my numbers are of a normal, healthy person's numbers, I still have to work hard every day with home therapy stretching exercises to keep it that way because I have bad genes that prevent me from healing properly so those numbers could change for the worse.  I am not home free, nor will I ever be.  This will be a life-long battle for me.  

(Most recent picture of me - 7/11/11)