Lonely

"Friends will keep you sane, Love could fill you heart, a lover can warm your bed, but lonely is the soul without a mate." ~David Pratt

It is an hour until my birthday and I officially leave my 20's and I guess I'm just feeling lonely tonight.  Another friend of mine just got engaged and with so many of my friends either with boyfriends or husbands or engaged I guess I'm feeling left behind.  It's been a long haul for me since my accident with the bad times far outweighing the good times.  And it's been even harder being alone in it all.  And I know I have my family and my awesome friends, the friends that are real and true, but I'm talking about the loneliness that comes with the lack of a significant other.  It can be so hard getting through times like this even when it's a time of celebration.  It's even harder getting through the tough times.  I wonder what love even feels like anymore I've been without it for so long.  Well, it's 30 minutes to my big 30th birthday now and tears are running down my cheek, rounding the corners of my mouth.

Where do I go?
When I'm feeling so lost and I don't want to be found.
When I'm looking and listening for that peace in my heart.
But I know I'll never hear that sound.
Where do I go?
Where do I go when I'm trying to laugh but all I can do I cry?
I'm trying to keep on living because I'm not ready to die.
Where do I go because the sun never seems to shine?
Can you give me my life back it's not yours it's mine?
How do I keep going, how do I fight this fight?
I'm tired of feeling beat down, but I'm trying with all my might!
Where do I go when my head hangs so low?
Please give me an answer because I just don't know!
Where do I go?
Does it take very long?
For me to find that peace and a place where I belong.
I need you to help me, help me to take a stand.
I'm scared to do it by myself, will you please take my hand?
Where do I go? Where do I go? Where do I go?
Do you know?

~Lisa Griffin