On Monday June 4th I will go in to have my 33rd surgery and on June 11th my 34th surgery. I have already started getting nervous and stressing over it. No matter how many surgeries I've had, I always get like this. It gets the worst the night before. I just don't have the best track record with smooth and successful surgeries, and not because of my doctors. I have incredible doctors that I just absolutely love. It is because of the betrayal of my own body not doing what the surgeons want it to do and that's one part to my nervousness and stress. The other is I do not like the feeling of losing control over my life by going under anesthesia. And it's not like I'm a control freak. It's just a complete feeling of helplessness over my body and my life once I feel the anesthesia hit my veins. And I have about 4 seconds to say good luck to myself and hope that nothing will go wrong. God, I hate it.
My surgeries this time around are to release contractures on the sides of my neck, the corners of my mouth and underneath my breasts. It's a two part surgery where they clean up the scar tissue and contractures first and then lay down what's called Allograft on the first surgery. The Allograft has to stay on for 5-7 days so that's why there's a week in between the surgeries. The second surgery they go in and remove the Allograft and replace it with my own donor skin. This has seemed to work rather well in the past with my body taking the grafts better since my body has a history of not wanting to take grafts easily so my doctor likes to stick to this routine in my surgeries.
My father is going to be coming with me to the first surgery and staying until about Wednesday and then going back home where my mom will come up on Sunday, June 10th and be there for the second surgery and stay with me until I come home. The second surgery will be the hardest because of the added donor sites to cause me pain. Donor sites are the worst because they are so painful. I'm not sure where he'll be taking the donor sites from but I'm assuming probably my legs since that's where he usually takes from.
Today I have a lot to do to get ready for being in the hospital for 2-3 weeks. I humbly ask for thoughts and prayers as I go into two more surgeries. I will keep you posted during the next few weeks on how things are going. Thank you all for your love and support through this arduous journey and recovery.
2 comments:
Thinking of you, Sarah! <3
Good luck to get through this with the most ease you can! You've got fans all over the world sending you love. Stay your strong self. Love.
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