Thursday, May 6, 2010

A Successful Failure

What I mean by a "Successful Failure" (as they put Apollo 13) is that the overall surgery went well, but, the ultimate goal was not achieved: they did not have enough skin from the expanders to do a complete flap around my neck. So, they used what they did and did what they could and left the tissue expanders in to expand my skin again. They also regrafted the side of my mouth using a split-thickness graft from my scalp so i have a little shaved area on my left side now.

I spent 4 days in the hospital and I am home now. First night home is always hard to adjust. The doctor came in one afternoon and sat down with me and my mom and basically told us it is going to be about a 1 1/2 years worth of reconstruction on my neck ALONE. So that was hard to actually finally HEAR some kind of timeline and hear from a DOCTOR'S mouth. I knew it all along, that it was going to be a long time yet, but to actually hear it said and for it to just be on one part of my body and not as a whole is hard.

I have so far yet to go and I am just screaming to be on my own again. So I silently cry and mourn a life I once had.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

No matter what happened in the past we cannot change it, good or bad it will forever be in the past. Futures are much the opposite as they can be changed, they are very unpredictable but we as humans have the capacity to modify and adapt to what we want as long as we satisfy what we need. What you are is nothing short of miracle in that you are a miraculous person with a heart of gold. Remember to walk where your feet take you which is always forward even if we loop in circles we are walking forward. We as your friends will go where life leads us and for many it's a path that will cross yours many times. You are not alone Sarah, and from the looks of it you will never be alone. The people that care about you will walk by your side, never behind, never in front but always by your side and at that very instance you stumble or fall we are there to catch you.